---
title: "Psychological challenges working on P2PRC POST 1"
summary: Mental challenges I face when working on open source project I created called P2PRC. 
date: 2021-22-06
tags: ["P2PRC","Psychological"]
author: "Akilan Selvacoumar"
draft: false
aliases: [/P2PRC_Psychological_1]
weight: 1
---

Okay so P2PRC is a technical topic atleast for me as it's about a peer to peer networks that is designed for computation. This post is about how I feel mentally working on this project. What I am talking about in this post can be linked to how I feel working in 
any of my personal projects. 

At the current stage of P2PRC, I have been trying to use my free time on trying to build a binary that just works. I know it's being 
optimistic but I am way over my head at many instances. The painful 
part for me is figure out how to get this project at a useful state. 

At the current moment P2PRC project is like me talking to myself. 
Example I create an Issue , fix it and review my own code. It's like taking to yourself. This is fine initially but it just feels 
extremely (i.e in kind words) lonely. No one is blame for this 
but it's a true fact in my case simple as that. 

I have no idea on why I keep working on this project. I guess 
maybe it's just that I have fun doing it. The true fact is that it 
is fun at times and really lonley at many times. As a hacker or
Open Source developer (i.e call it whatever you like). The important thing would just be feedback and hopefully feeling 
happy on what you built.

I promoised that I would continue this project for 3 more years and
see how it continues from there. The project is at the very initial stages and very tough to say what would be it's fate. The aim of this was to be helping hand towards the main aim of creating a distributed game engine. But at the moment have no clue on how a 
game engine works. 
